Checkmate

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I can't help but feel like a pawn in a game of chess instead of the queen.  I keep wondering what I am doing in the front lines of this battle.  If I had a choice, I would be the queen, but can I choose the piece I am playing in this game?

It isn't making sense to me.  The king is looking for his queen, and he wants to rule his kingdom together with the bishop, horse and tower, as well as with his pawns.  The queen can move diagonally and horizontally, and is therefore a powerful and highly desirable piece.  The bishop moves diagonally, the tower horizontally, and the horse in an L-shape.  The pawn can move either one or two steps forward, and can kill someone diagonally.  In order for me to be a queen, I need to be able to sweep across the floor without becoming vulnerable.  I need other pieces around me to protect me.  

In my current position in life, I do not feel worthy of the position of queen.  Therefore I question the reality of the pursuit of the king.  Is he mistaking me for the queen, when in fact I am in no higher standing than a pawn on a chess board?  Or am I underestimating the value within me that allows me to stand next to this king and not be afraid that it is actually the bishop, the horse or the tower that should be filling my shoes?

Or perhaps I am too focused on the king and queen in white to realise that in a game of chess, there is an opponent, and it is my goal to "checkmate", winning only once I have defeated the king.  Questions of worthiness and competition are playing havoc in my heart.  I am indeed moving to the other side of the board.


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