Polyfiller

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Bought Polyfiller today – making sure I don’t fall through the cracks.

I am torn between two churches – the one where I felt spiritually led when I first arrived in Rustenburg, and the other, which is close by and where the message is preached strongly. The former entails the discomfort of facing the once-was and the frills and thrills that came with that, which now I need to cut down to size and proportion, allowing myself the minimalist approach to people lest I incur a similar group identity which fails me in the end.

Having a second option is a fine resource, but one which offers convenience and friendship over a peaceful and tender-hearted worship service. My heart prefers the former, while my mind the latter, and yet neither meet in the middle. Thus I, instead of settling in but one place, have found myself sitting in the crack, between the two, and unable to budge.

My God has brought me here, that is clear. But who does he want me to fellowship with? Where is He calling me to now? There is a season for everything, and after winter comes spring. A new leaf unfurls, and its seed drops off, whilst its roots take hold. Rustenburg is the place of rest. How long must I rest here, Lord? What are you preparing me for? I wait on You, Lord.

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