What I learnt

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What I learnt during my time in hospital is that emotional pain is far greater than physical pain, and emotional pain often manifests in physical pain.  What I also learnt is that the burden of guilt is far heavier than the sorrows of victims.  

I learnt that having an interest in other people keeps you young.  And I learnt that the comfort of a gift given in love and compassion far outweighs the gift itself.  I learnt that compassion can turn to cruelty, but also to great beauty.  

I learnt that God is a God of miracles, making human beings in such a way that their bones will heal back together in time, their eyes will heal themselves, and nerves will connect internally when a leg is amputated, but He also gives us the courage and hope to continue when we have suffered ill, wrongdoing or injustice. 

When I think of Tammi, I smile.  He is a 22-year old handsome man, his leg amputated from below his knee, and yet he smiles and looks ahead with optimism and ambition.  He is full of courage, and I can only hope and pray that he never loses that spirit of life within him.  

What I learnt is my real desire for a quiet and simple life.  I learnt that I loved having my friends visit me, and that I love my friends.  I learnt that a harmonious connection between two people is something special, and that there are too many complex dynamics to justify everything you say and do.  

I learnt that your instincts are probably right, even if you push them aside for the sake of indulgence in attention, but we should not cut our chords because others don't meet our expectations and disappoint us.  Instead we can treat each relationship for what it is and try to strengthen our strengths and weaken our weaknesses.  

That is what I am learning - that is not to say that the lesson is applicable to all at all times, nor that I am right, but rather that that is how I currently view life, and perhaps tomorrow's lesson will grow greater wisdom in me.  That is what I hope for.  That is my prayer.

   



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