What's in a cup?

I was thinking about it today.  Why am I so addicted to cappuccinos?  Someone once said to me, it is social snobbery, to which I decided to take no offense.  And yet, if someone offered me a cup of coffee for free or a cappuccino for R15.00, I would still prefer to have a cappuccino.  There is no price too high to pay for an addict.  It is not as serious as smoking or drinking, I assure myself, and yet any addiction takes away your personal freedom and puts you in bondage.  

What will it take for me to quit?  I used to ask myself the same question when I smoked, and when I smoked weed, and when I drank.  It is not so much what I am addicted to that troubles me, but that I have these "addictive" thoughts.  I have an attitude of "needing" this fix, or of wanting it so badly that I will go out of my way to get it, regardless of how inconvenient it is.  As a matter of fact, I think this addiction might also lead me into temptations such as accepting an invitation from a man to join him at a restaurant, not because I seek his company, but because I want a cappuccino.  I was imagining the scenario today, where I was sitting in a cafe, with my cappuccino, and halfway through the cup, my boyfriend breaks up with me, or mistreats me, and all I'd be thinking about was wanting to finish the cup.  

And that is pretty much when it dawned on me that this addiction is serious.  Now all I can do is pray for deliverance.  I should definitely prioritize on the internal matters, matters of dignity and respect, where nothing outside myself controls me.  That would mean, I could go anywhere and be anywhere, and not think I "need" anything.  If I get a cappuccino in the morning, great!  But if I don't, I won't fret.  That is having a healthy relationship with cappuccino.  But for now, what I know I should do is go cold turkey.  And consider anti-fatigue mineral supplements.  



 



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